To Do

 

“Do or do not, there is no try.” - Yoda

Some images stay with you forever.  Like a gigantic fish encased in glass on a pier in Maryland does for me. Allow me to explain.

It was twenty five years ago when my wife and I were on our honeymoon in Ocean City, Maryland and I was still getting used to wearing a wedding ring.  We were walking on the boardwalk when we got to the end and there was this enormous, mounted  tiger shark staring at us.

This was no ordinary fish.  This tiger shark held the Maryland State Record weighing in at an incredible 1200 lbs.  Far more intriguing was the fact that the monstrous fish was caught on July 9^th, 1983 off the shore of Ocean City by a woman from Buffalo, New York, named Grace Czerniak.  Someone who I believe would best resemble your favorite aunt. 

Nowhere, on the plaque next to the shark, does it mention any personal statement from the angler about the struggle that ensued once she hooked the massive shark.  Nor, the actual length of time the battle endured.  The only evidence that she had to prove that she had done what she set out to do was an impressively large fish in a glass box.

It took Thomas Edison an epic amount of effort till he succeeded and invented electricity.  It took Walt Disney twenty years and a whole lot of persistence till he could get the rights to make the movie, Mary Poppins.  And it took it great endurance for Grace Czerniak, a middle aged woman from Buffalo, to land a shark off the shore of Ocean City, Maryland.  After great effort the final result was success.

Another prime example of this kind of effort can apply to marriage.  I did not promise to try my best twenty five years ago on March 24^th, 1989.  The vows I took to my wife were called I DO’s.  For better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and health, till death do us part.  Now, that is something worth wearing a wedding ring for, which fits a lot tighter now, to remind me to do what I promised to do.

So, whether you are inventing something, taking on an exciting challenge, landing a shark or just loving your spouse always, seek to do it till you get it done.

Swavel

 

 

Slightly Confused

   

 

Good intentions are not always enough, so always have a good apology at the ready.

Confession is good for the soul, so here goes.  At times I get slightly confused. 

This can be aptly summarized by a moment that happened several years ago in my work parking lot.   A friend had told me he had some second-hand clothes for my daughter and that all I needed to do was go into his Honda Civic and take the bag of clothes.

On that particular day my friend was preoccupied with work, so I went looking for his Honda on my own.  I opened what I thought was my friend’s car, but to my chagrin I could not find the bag.  So, I began to rummage through his car.

Then out of nowhere, I was startled by an angry voice of an employee I did not know.  He was reprimanding me for going through his car and threatened to call security to apprehend me.   Feeling embarrassed, dumbfounded and slightly confused, quickly I started to apologize.  Seeing that I was in a dire predicament I tried in vain to explain that his Honda Civic generally fit my friend’s description.  

In an attempt to diffuse the already volatile situation I looked for a witness to help validate my point of view.  Fortunately I found a receptionist who had seen the whole disaster though her window and she substantiated that I was telling the truth. Soon afterward the frustrated employee relented and left the scene.

Now, when I look back at my parking lot debacle it makes me chuckle. I may be slightly confused at times, but it is great reminder that regardless of the gaffe I can still laugh at myself.  

Better to be slightly confused and have a sense of humor, than to be angry with none at all.

Swavel

 

 

Facing Fear

 

“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”  FDR

In times like these we tend to fear things. Like fear of the unknown, the fear of losing our jobs, fear of dying.  Mostly, I think we fear the loss of control and the inability to protect those we love.

Jesus said, “Do not fear those who kill the body, but cannot kill the soul.”  Rather, we should attempt to be like the Psalmist who says, “And now Lord, what do I wait for?   My hope is in you.”

Now, that sounds all spiritual, but, fear still sounds scary to me.  However, if I say I trust in God I need to live that way.  Therefore, despite my apprehension I must push past what I feel.

Here is a list of some fears that I struggle with from time to time, in no particular order:

-Fear of my family’s future.  Long story short but life has taught me that I need to do my part, but my family is in God’s hands and that is where they are safest.

-Fear of the unknown.  I say I trust God with everything, yet I am inconsistent.  He can see yesterday, today and tomorrow all at the same time and yet I have trust issues.  I need to let God deal with the unknown.

-Fear of dying.  The older I get the more I think we are just passing through and all our bodies are just rentals.  Not to mention, if Jesus says heaven is far better than here, who am I to question.

-Fear of not being good enough. This is a work in progress in my life because I want to be content, without being indifferent. 

-Fear of failure.  At least for me, I have begun to embrace the fact that I fail a lot and store away the knowledge I gain through difficulty, then use it at a later date.

-Fear of the dark.  Not so much anymore, seems I am outgrowing that one.  Now, I am more afraid of what is in the darkness. 

Fear of sharks. Sounds silly I know because I have a better chance of being hit by lightning than getting attacked by a Great White.  However, sharks are a lot like other intimidating situations in life that bare their teeth and at full speed take a run at us seeking to destroy us.

-Fear of being paralyzed or getting Alzheimer’s. Lately, I’ve been reading the book, The Diving Bell and the Butterfly. that was written by a forty year old man who had locked-in disorder.  I know this may be getting worked up over nothing, but what illness may befall your body cannot always be avoided.  See fear of the unknown.

- Fear of evil.  It is everywhere and seems so intimidating and overwhelming, yet evil will not win the day.  Like Edmund Burke once said, “The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing.”

“One fear I need never have is the fear of not knowing God.”
Swavel

Ashtray Solution

 

“Don’t mock it, till you try it.”

 

Some things in life make little or no sense.  No matter how hard you try to figure it, certain things just work.

 

 For example, currently the heater fan at times  in my 1997Olsmobile  will suddenly stop working.  All I do is open the ashtray and slam it quickly shut until the yellow light comes on and I have heat again. Hence, the ashtray solution.  Allow me to explain.

 

Sometime during the past summer I discovered that the fan that controls the air conditioner and the heater stopped working.  Strangely, however my bipolar fan would kick back on periodically on its own. 

 

To make sure this wasn’t too big a problem I called my mechanic and he said that it was an electrical problem that was hard to diagnose and use it till the fan dies.    So, I just put up with this scenario and decided to wait it out.

 

It was sometime in early December when I stumbled upon the  ashtray solution.  I needed my defroster to work so I could clear my front windshield of ice.  In an act of frustration I quickly opened and then slammed my ashtray shut.  Somehow I thought it might work, like when you hit the dash in your car to convince the c d player to stop skipping, and to my surprise it did.  Truly, it was a McGyver moment. 

 

Then at Christmas time my electrical engineering son was home from college.  He took a look and said he knew what the problem was, but didn’t have the equipment to tear my dash apart properly.  With that being said I didn’t want to stretch my luck too far and I set up a appointment with a mechanic to get properly fixed.

 

So, I said all that to tell you that two months after it was fixed I hit a pothole and the heater died again.  So I am back to using the ashtray solution again.  Go figure, it works so why fight it.

 

In my life, I have discovered when things go wrong it always better to laugh than cry and if the opportunity presents itself, slam the ashtray shut real quick.

 

Swavel

 

Warming Up

 

Spring is in the air.

When it gets cold, like it did this morning, the only other thing that truly warms me up are thoughts of spring.  For me, thoughts of spring begin when pitchers and catchers report to spring training to warm up for the upcoming season.  Spring training means that winter is just about over and grown men have a valid excuse to play catch again.

Several springs ago it dawned on me the value of warm-ups in my own life.  It was during that fateful spring that I was coach of my church softball team.  On one very dubious evening I inadvertently made a scheduling error that caused my team to show up late and subsequently forfeit the game.  Worst yet the whole team showed up and then got back into their cars disgustedly to drive the  forty minutes home.

Feeling humiliated and full of adrenaline I asked my catcher if he would stay to throw a few warm-up pitches with me.  About 30 pitches later I was feeling much better and then something strange happened.   A neighborhood boy about ten, along with his mom, approached me to ask me something.  Inquisitively I said yes.  He then asked what was my favorite thing about the game?  “Warm-ups”, I said after a brief moment of thought. 

In essence, warm-ups are that brief moment of the day no one can get to you.  As a pitcher you can’t walk anyone, the pop in the glove sounds louder and you feel like you could throw the ball through a brick wall.  Then when done we exchange manly handshakes and go about life. 

I have always known this act to have a special quality about it.  Probably, since I was a young boy in the back yard playing catch with my dad or as dad myself playing catch with my son as he grew up, but until that night I never verbalized it.  Warming up or playing catch almost always leaves me feeling better. 

 

Just something about pitchers and catchers reporting early to warm-up that  lets me know that all is well with my world.

 

Swavel

 

Truly Devoted

Unlike saccharin for sugar, there is no substitute in a child’s life for a father’s love and acceptance.

Hours before the Seattle Seahawks won their first Super Bowl on Feb. 2^nd, 2014 I told my friend, Steve that for his sake I wished his team would win.  Hands down, Steve is the most truly devoted Seahawks fan I know, yet underneath it all he is actually more truly devoted to his dad. Let me explain.

Steve’s dad was Greek and knew nothing about American football.  However, Steve who had been in this country since age two was a big fan of the then four time Super bowl champions, Pittsburgh Steelers.  His hope for Christmas the in 1980 was a Steelers’ replica football helmet, similar to the game worn type.  So, he dropped the necessary hints and waited in anticipation that his dad would deliver the goods.

When Christmas day came Steve was psyched to find a helmet shaped box with his name on it under the tree. Nevertheless, when he opened the box he did not find a black helmet with a Steeler logo, but rather a silver one with a funny looking bird on it. 

Steve was faced with a real conundrum.  Either he could choose to remain a Steelers’ fan and display his disappointment hurting his dad or switch allegiance and cheer for a team he knew nothing about.

In his own words this is why he chose Seattle: As my 10-year-old self looked over at my dad in bewilderment, I will never forget the smile on his face. He was so proud of himself. He had gotten his boy the HELMET he wanted, not realizing that the COLORS on the helmet were significant.  That Seahawks helmet hangs in my garage today as a reminder that my dad's ignorance of the game was overshadowed by his love for his son.

Truly devoted goes both ways; it begins with the father showing the son and the son reciprocating it.

Swavel

 

Down TIme

“Down time as defined by Webster’s is time when you are not working or busy.” 

 

This blog initially was intended to be a tribute to a friend and his father; unfortunately a sinus affliction had other plans.  So, I thought I would write briefly about the benefits of down time, instead of focusing rather on the negative side of sickness.

. 

Here are three thoughts that come to mind:

 

PRAY- During the past five days, when my head was throbbing, I tried to think of others and their concerns rather than just my own.  Someone always has it worse and God always has time to listen.  Often when I am sick I find that I pray with more passion and belief that my prayers truly matter.  As if the outcome of others can be affected by my simple heart felt pleas to the Almighty.

 

BELIEVE- The Bible says in Romans that when I am weak, then I am strong.  This is a strange concept that most of us I believe fail to grasp.  Yet, I find that often when I try to figure  things out on my own I fail miserably.  However, when I give it to God, it works it.  Another verse In John says that without God I can do nothing. How very true.

 

RELY- Another thing I found comforting was  my wife was such a wonderful example of someone I can rely on.  Often I like to plow ahead instead of rest.  I saw my wife, as she always does, picking up extra groceries for me, shoveling the snow, and picking up the kids while I rested, plus everything else she does in a day .  Not a surprise because my wife does all things anyway, yet it just was the way she did it and the knowing she was there for me when I couldn't do my part.

 

So, in conclusion I found this: down time well spent not only helps heal the body, but the soul as well 

 

 Swavel

Notwithstanding

 “Ever tried. Ever failed. No matter. Try again.  Fail again. Fail Better.”  Samuel Beckett

Notwithstanding means in spite of and no one man embodies this sentiment better than Terry Bradshaw.

Growing up in the nineteen seventies there was no better team in professional football than the Pittsburgh Steelers. Consequently, in a span of six years the Steelers won four Super Bowls and were deemed a dynasty.  Terry Bradshaw was their quarterback.  So, you might think like I did, that being the quarterback of such a prolific team would be a very enviable position.  However, it wasn’t.  Despite all the challenges Bradshaw succeeded anyway.

Form the moment the lowly 1-13 Steelers drafted Bradshaw with the first pick of the draft in 1971 the Louisiana native was faced with multiple challenges.  For beginners, Pittsburgh had a history of losing and number twelve was expected to be their savior.  Amidst such lofty expectations Terry struggled early on and one point found himself being benched in favor of the backup. 

Notwithstanding, a  few years  later he got  his starting gig back and made the most of it winning two Super Bowls in a row from 1974 to 1975.  Then in 1976, Cleveland Browns defensive end, Turkey Jones unceremoniously dumped Bradshaw on his head, as the above picture depicts. Terry suffered a concussion and damaged vertebrae in his neck and was lost for the season.

Throughout his career as well he was dogged by critics saying he lacked intelligence, mistaking his good ol’ boy demeanor for stupidity.  Not to mention, having marital troubles leading to divorce.  Yet through it all Bradshaw and the Steelers got back to the Super Bowl again in the 1978 and 1979 seasons and won again being named MVP in both Super Bowls. 

It seemed that when the pressure was greatest Terry rose to the occasion.  Bradshaw’s career seems to validate the motto; you can’t keep a good man down, because he used his failures to help him better succeed.

Notwithstanding, when life knocks you down, get back up determined to do the same to what knocked you down.

Swavel

 

Well Done

“Somewhere along the way, we must learn that there is nothing greater than to do something for others.”  Martin Luther King Jr.

The other morning I was drinking coffee when I noticed the word well emblazoned on the side of my mug.  It gave me great pause and I filed it away.  Then the other day on my car radio I heard this speech from Martin Luther King, Jr:

“… if it falls your lot to be a street sweeper, go on out and sweep streets like Michelangelo painted pictures; sweep streets like Handel and Beethoven composed music; sweep streets like Shakespeare wrote poetry; sweep streets so well that all the host of heaven and earth will have to pause and say, "Here lived a great street sweeper who swept his job well."

Funny how so many of us think that what we do and who we are matters so little.  Yet, how often are we influenced by the most unlikely of sources.

For example, throughout history many have labored in jobs that were well done.  A secretary named Rosa Parks  refused to give up her seat after a long hard day and inspired a whole country.  Todd Beamer,  an ordinary business man on a plane trip,  gave up his life for his country on 9/11 . Mother Teresa humbled herself to live in poverty with the poor.  Even Anne Frank, who was just a teen, wrote memoirs in her diary that inspired millions during the holocaust.

Then there is the example of Jesus, who was a carpenter by trade. Just imagine how priceless a chair or table would be today handcrafted by the Son of God?  However, not only was he a fine craftsman, but he was obedient to the task God the Father had given Him as He gave up his life for ours.   Just like Jesus lived His life to please the Father may it be said of us at the end, "well done thou good and faithful servant."

God bless the street sweeper and anyone else who has toiled in a job where only God and his angels have said well done. 

May well done not only apply to how you liked your steaks cooked , but to how you lived your life as well..

Swavel

 

Della's View

 

“The view from the point where we buried my sister is sublime.  I never saw a prettier place anywhere.” Brother of Della Mayers.

It was just a few years ago when I heard this phrase mentioned in reference to the Rhoads Opera House Fire that occurred on January 13^th, 1908. Sadly, Della Mayers, the ill-fated play’s lecturer, and 170 others lost their lives in the tragic blaze.  Strangely I felt the need to find her.   So, whenever time permitted I set out on a mild pursuit of her gravesite, so I could witness this incredible view that gave her brother such great solace. 

Her body is laid to rest in Fairview cemetery in Boyertown, Pennsylvania where my grandfather is buried and only minutes from where I grew up and now live. However, no matter how often my wife and I tried to find her marker, the exact location eluded us. Often I would leave the cemetery wondering why I bothered, but now I think I know why: I was trying to find the sublime.

At the time of the tragedy Della was fifty one years old and resided in Colorado along with her husband, J.J. Mayers.  Her sister, the play’s author Mrs. Harriet Monroe, was having voice trouble and had persuaded Della to come east in her stead. As the story goes, since Mrs. Mayers was the lecturer she was positioned right near the projector where the fire accidently broke out.   It was said of her that she died valiantly trying to save others.   

Her husband so distraught over her loss could not bring himself to make the trip east to bury her. Consequently, her body now resides on a quaint, quiet hillside overlooking a town she only briefly knew.  Two of her brothers however made the trip and one made an eloquent observation that drew me in some hundred years later.

Thankfully, about four months ago, my wife and I found Della and the blissful view we had been promised.  Her brother was right the view is sublime, which by definition means awe inspiring and impressive.  And believe you me; nothing represents that better than Della’s life, death and her view.

Some things in life are worth finding if only for the view.

Swavel