Elevator Praying

 

The best way to fight evil is on your knees.

Lately, even though I know better, I have been fighting myself.  To be more specific, I had been trying to take on life by myself.  In times past I used to start the mornings alone on my knees.  Not as a matter of strength, but rather my own weakness.  I need to get back to that. 

This is a lesson I learned through tragedy.  It was a different time, a much more desperate time.   During this very trying period in my life, I spent much time in an elevator on my knees.  Long story short, several years ago members of my family were in the hospital.  Often, on my way up to visit them on the elevator, I would fall to my knees pleading with God to show mercy on my family. It didn’t matter to me if anyone else would see me or not when the doors opened, because I so needed God.

In particular this way of praying has been reinforced by this year’s viewing of the movie, Passion of the Christ, which is an annual thing for me.  Each year I view it I try to focus on a different facet and key phrase I missed the year before.  For example, one year I watched Jesus’ eyes and the compassion he showed to others.  And who can forget the phrase Christ utters from the cross to his tormentors, Father forgive them, they know not what they do.

However, this year it has taken me many sittings to get through the opening scene in the garden where Jesus was betrayed.  Sadly, I have gotten too easily distracted, too busy for Jesus.  Maybe I did not want to go through the painful minutes of seeing Jesus so badly treated.  Or like lately in the mornings I have chosen to try life my own way.

What has impressed me this year is when Jesus is on his knees talking to His Heavenly Father in the garden at midnight. He is pleading with God the Father to let this cup pass from Him.  Jesus then states, not my will be done, but thy will be done.  All the while, sweating drops of blood.  He knew he must be on the same page as God the Father, it wasn’t about Him.

There was another scene, particularly a phrase, that struck me later in the movie when Christ, bloodied and battered was carrying his cross though the streets.  It was a scene when Jesus’ mother, Mary, out of desperation said to John, help me get near him.  Subsequently, in the scene she is on her knees as she consoles her hardly recognizable son.   For me, that means to sacrifice convenience and trying to do things my way.  Meaning, much like Mary out of desperation, I need to begin each day alone on my knees elevator praying, getting close to Jesus.

For me it is simple, since Jesus hung in there for me on the cross, I need to daily fall on my knees and lean in to Him. 

Swavel