Grapes Explode

 

Life is usually a lot less painful if we only we paid a bit more attention to it.

Just the other day I heard this interesting fact, grapes explode if you microwave them. A great fact, albeit a little obvious.  Then again when I look at my own life I have done some pretty dumb things myself.

So, I made a list of things I have done and/or things I strongly suggest you not try:

1- Don’t microwave anything containing aluminum foil.  At my first job I tried to microwave a cheesesteak in a brown wrapper, unbeknownst to me, that was lined with aluminum foil. Consequently, it caught on fire and an elderly lady from work stomped on my sandwich till the fire went out.

2- Don’t lock your keys in your car.  Sadly, this just happened to me in the last year or so.  Bottom line is keep your keys on your person at all times or have back-up keys readily accessible.  Also, I learned my car is not that hard to break into, which should alarm me, but does not for some odd reason.

3- Don’t trim weeds where concealed poison ivy might be lurking, especially if you are susceptible to getting it.  This is a lesson I seem to re-visit every few years or so.  Too much of a hurry seems to be at the root of this problematic state.

4- Don’t turn on too many appliances at once, because you will blow a fuse.  The reason behind this problem is forgetting to consider the consequences and I rent an older house.  Should know better.  If the AC, microwave and coffee maker are all on at the same time, you better be ready to run to the cellar and flip the breaker.

 5- Don’t wear a good shirt when you are brushing your teeth.  Combination of not planning ahead and not caring till it’s too late results in a pesky stain on my shirt.  The temporary solution is to change the shirt or hope it washes out, which it seldom does.

6- Don’t wear a good shirt and then drink coffee. Same solution as # 5.  You would think that I would learn. The lousy part about coffee stains is that they hurt a little as well, not to mention it is a little embarrassing trying to dry your shirt at work with a hand dryer.

 

7- Don’t leave ball point pens or markers in your pants’ pockets when they go through the washer.  This is a serious point of contention with the family and I understand why they feel this way.  Reason being is that I have an obsession with always carrying writing utensils with me at all times.

8- Don’t drop electronic devices or else you might break them.  Aka Tom Brady.  I added this one to make myself feel better.  If a pro athlete can ruin his phone, than we all should feel a little bit better when we do something a little klutzy.

9- Don’t forget to check the oil in your car on a regular basis.  Sadly, this is lesson I have derived from personal experience while dating my wife.  What can I say, I missed the automotive gene in my family, but there is still no good excuse for that one.

10- Don’t step on LEGOS in your bare feet.  When you do step on a LEGO without protection, and I have, it is like stepping on shards of glass.  Automatically you feel an uncontrollable urge to utter bad words.

Therefore what should one take away from observing such mishaps?  The answer is simple: be more compassionate. As a result, when I see other people stumble in life or get poison ivy, which I currently have, I need to give them the benefit of the doubt and not pass judgment on them.  But, for the grace of God there go I.

We laugh when we hear that grapes explode in a microwave, yet many of us are making a mess of our own lives by making similar nonsensical choices.

Swavel