Hmmm

 
A moment in time sometimes can only be captured by your mind’s eye and then held in your soul forever.

Hmmm is that wordless, special moment that you don’t want to mess with, but rather you let it play itself out. There are two kind of hmm moments: the tough kind and the good kind.

The tough kind is like a death in the family or a break up or other such events when a heart is broken.  During those times flippant words can make it worse.  During tough times I hate when I can’t make it better for my family and or friends.   Rather, a hand on the shoulder or a hug is the only thing that can remotely suffice and relay my sympathy.

The good kind of hmmm moment however you don’t want to rush and end before it has entirely unfolded. These moments are just magical with no need to define or explain when the heart is soaring.  For example, it’s like when your kid is born or hits a homerun or gets married.

Speaking of, here are some such moments in time from my son, Jordan and his bride, Miranda’s wedding on Saturday, June 13^th:

* During the ceremony, Steve, a family friend and the officiating pastor said the key word to remember was REPEAT.  When he said it I thought how perfect. Every lasting relationship has elements in it that are familiar. Unfortunately, there are no ancient Chinese secrets to a happy marriage; at least that I am aware of anyway.  When you truly love someone, you love being with them and spending time with them.  In essence, you repeat the act of love every day as you move together and marvel where it takes the both of you.
  
* After the wedding concluded I high fived my son on his way down the aisle to leave the ceremony with his bride. It was just one of those opportunities to let my son know of my approval of his choice.  Some things are best when they are simple and to the point. On a side note, there was a Big Hero 6 moment when I fist-bumped the groomsman who ushered my lovely wife and I out of the ceremony. Fa la la la.

* There were smiles and tears a plenty as Miranda danced with her dad during the reception. It was obvious during their special father-daughter dance how much they loved one another.   Fathers need to show their daughters they approve as well and it was nice to see it so openly on display.

* However, the most definite thumbs up in my soul kind of moment had to be when the groom danced with bride.  Jordan led Miranda around the dance floor arm in arm as he carefully led her and periodically spun her in circles . Marriage is like a good dance because you are partners and you need to stay in step with one another.

The best part of marriage however is what is to come; the wedding is just the beginning of the book.   There are so many more chapters yet to be written.  My advice is to always stay close to God, the author, and let Him pen you a masterpiece.
 

Hmmm should be another way of describing marital bliss, not a sarcastic remark meant to cause harm.

Swavel

 

Lights Out

Simple, yet effective concept in life - finish what you started.

Many years ago, in what seemed another lifetime - I was a church softball coach.  To be accurate I wasn’t particularly good, but I enjoyed doing it for the most part.  No pay, lots of phone calls, plenty of complaints and I always was the last to leave.

One of the things that came with the job was being there early to line and rake the infield and put the bases in the ground.  It was often lonely work, but it was like writing the foreword in a book, something that needed to be done so things get begin.  The job however I remember most fondly was turning the lights off after the game.

The peculiar thing about turning off the lights was that it was a love/hate kind of thing.   On the nights that we lost I hated it, because I just wanted to go home. Consequently I would drive my car out to the shed, which was approximately a few hundred feet from the center field fence, pull the switch, jump back in the car and dejectedly go home.  It was like putting the field to sleep, like you tuck your kids in before they go to sleep, after you had a particularly trying evening.  Love you, sleep good, goodnight and hit the switch.

However on the nights that we won, I loved turning off the lights because it was heaven.  Needless to say, in the early years that wasn’t so frequent.  On those nights I didn’t want to hit the switch and end the party.    On those nights I would walk and not drive to the shed to turn off the lights.  Time didn’t seem to matter because I wanted to bask in the glow and relive the highlights of the game in my mind.  As I would stand out past centerfield and look at the ball field, l felt like a proud father taking it all in and smilingly remembering.  Then I would turn the lights out and beamingly go home.

That reminds me of an inspirational quote entitled The Essence of A New Day.  It goes like this… This is the beginning of a new day.  You have been given this day to use as you will.  You can waste it or use it for good.  What you do today is important because you are exchanging a day of your life for it.  When tomorrow comes, this day will be gone forever; in its place is something that you have left behind…let it be something good. 

    

For me, lights out is a husband and a father’s privilege, one I have had for some twenty six years now.  It is an opportunity to momentarily evaluate the completed day.  One in which hopefully I haven’t wasted because life is too short; here one moment, gone the next.  So, someone has to turn out the lights, why not me. 

Lights out is that sacred moment when the chapter of today’s book is complete and you must put a bookmark in it till tomorrow

Swavel

Ignore the Dog

 Encouraging bad behavior is akin to allowing a bull to roam free in a china shop...

Here is a fact:  I am not a dog person.  Rather, I would like to be characterized as a dog appreciator because there is something unique a dog can give to their owner.

About two months ago, my family and I got a dog.  His name is Jax.  We found him at an SPCA and after a week of searching other places we decided to get him.  He is a five and half years old, Jug, which is part Jack Russell and part Pug.  Jax is a great dog and that is saying a lot since dogs and I are not usually best of friends.

The main reason our family decided to get a dog is because of our daughters.  We wanted our youngest daughter to learn to connect with dogs, so one day she can get her own seeing-eye dog and get around on her own. Owning a dog also provides an excellent opportunity for our oldest daughter to gain valuable responsibility taking care of him and garner some companionship as well.

The one annoying habit our dog displayed initially was bark uncontrollably when we come home from somewhere.  To remedy the problem, we watched a dog trainer video on you-tube.  His advice was simple - IGNORE THE DOG.  Amazingly, it works like a charm.  Often when I come home, I talk under my breath to remind myself - ignore the dog.

The premise of ignoring the dog works because the animal reacts to us.  If we yell when we get home, he gets excited and responds accordingly.  If we stay calm, he stays calm. What a great lesson from man’s best friend.

Many successful people are known for being at their best when things are at their worst or most stressful. There are many words to describe it: unflappable, irascible, undeterred, regardless, cool as a cucumber, calm and collected. It is almost as if things slow down for some people when things are going crazy all around them.

 

Here are a few examples of those who have ignored the dog and done what needed to be done:

·         Early in his pro basketball career, Michael Jordan’s critics claimed that his jump shot wasn’t good enough. So, in the off season, he took hundreds of shots every day until he became what many now consider one of the greatest basketball players of all time.

·         Throughout her life, Mother Teresa, set out to love the least of these, the little orphans of India.  Regardless of how small and frail her stature was, she didn’t stop until God took her home.

·         Despite being President during the Civil War, Abraham Lincoln persevered till he freed the slaves, despite being hated and eventually assassinated.

·         Then there is Joni Erickson Tada who despite being paralyzed in her late teens did not let her wheel chair keep her down.  With God’s help, over thirty years ago, she established a ministry called, Joni and Friends, which supports and aids the handicapped community worldwide.

The art of remaining calm and confident is one we should all strive to master. Whether it is just training our dog to behave, or doing something of critical or eternal significance.

Ignore the dog or whatever it is that tries to drag you down to its level.

Swavel